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Wednesday, 22 February 2012

Where's Madeleine McCann NOW? Competition for AUGUST

Congratulations to Mr. C. Mitchell of North London who wins our "Maddie's next sighting" competition for JULY with his entry entitled SPAIN.

Competition entries now being accepted for AUGUST.

We are especially interested in applications featuring unusual specific locations and scenarios. Additional prizes will be awarded to those participants who can produce the most creative and stimulating entries, for example incorporating a supermarket, petrol station or cafeteria, (although these actual examples will NOT be accepted due to them already having been exhaustively submitted).

BONUS prizes will also be awarded for those entries where, in the Judge’s opinion, the best creativity can be employed relating to  any interesting or discerning feature of the person(s), accompanying Madeleine. For example, ‘swarthy’, ‘nervous looking’, ‘scruffy’ or ‘Romanyesque’ (Gypsy-like).

Please note, we are currently unable to accept entries denoting the Countries of INDIA or MOROCCO due to previous sightings there having been shown to have been entirely FABRICATED.  (UPDATE: We are also NOT accepting further entries denoting SPAIN, given their complete lack of any credibility whatsoever).

We are also unable to accept entries from ex-pat British Holiday makers whose amnesia attacks momentarily go into remission, alowing them to recal some vital clue that hitherto was never reported in the first instance.

Likewise, we can not entertain entries involving Taxi Drivers, Cleaning company vans, convicted paedophiles, (alive OR dead), on the basis of their sheer ridiculousness, even to readers of the Daily Mail.

Please send your competition entries together with your £15.00 entry fee, (cheque, postal order, bank draft, cash in any denomination or currency, or your unwanted gold jewellery,) to: 

PO BOX 101

The winning entry chosen after August 30th will win a complete NEW UPVC Double Glazed Window replacement system from EVEREST, (proprietor B. Kennedy).

5 Runners up will receive a FREE 1 hour legal advice consultation, courtesy of  C.Ruck of London

10 Runners up will receive a free tour of the ITV studios with popular presenter Loraine Kelly.

20 further runners up will receive signed copies of ‘Madeleine’, by Kate McCann.

ALL entrants will receive a FREE ‘Look for Madeleine’ Wristband (NOT including Postage and Packing costs of £10.99)

Good luck!!

Terms ad Conditions:
Please note the winning entrant will be required to undertake a wide publicity campaign incorporating ALL popular Press and Media outlets, where you will be required to make and sign a sworn Affidavit relating to the "100% certainty" of your sighting, together with your declaration that the Portuguese authorities are "useless Boozy Porto Sardine-Munching plod" who refused to listen to the report of your sighting in the first place. (Even if you didn't make one).

Judges decision is FINAL. (Unless it later transpires your submission perfectly matches a sighting subsequently published in the tabloid Press in which case it may well be used to back up the veracity of that one).


  1. Priceless Mike. .You have cheered a lot of people up :))

  2. Love it, love your wit man.

  3. Another offensive and witless disrespectful post.

    It sullies the memory of a small girl and casts spudgun and supporters into the role of ghouls.

    People who get their jollies from joking about Madeleine deserve no respect.

    I have started forwarding these 'jokes' to red-top editors with a request to expose the ghouls who like to make jokes about Madeleine McCann.

  4. Spudgun is not the one sullying the memory of a small, defenceless child - her parents are doing a good job of that all by themselves. Nobody on here jokes about Madeleine AT ALL, least of all Spudgun. we are looking at past form for the McCanns which always brings out a "sighting" just before some news breaks or, in this case, before Kate's "new" paperback emerges. It's all "a good marketing ploy" as Gerry noted when asked why he thought it better to disregard police advice and promote Madeleine's eye defect.Spudgun is having a dig at the parents and certainly not at Madeleine.

  5. You are one disgusting unfunny horrible person, an excuse for a man. Go hang your baldy head in shame.

  6. Foxylady you are not two faced you are forty faced. You should keep a tab on what you write and where you write it. Bum sore from sitting on that fence is it?

  7. Why didn't you include Gerry? I wanna win a scan performed by the very compassionate doctor!

  8. Anonymous 3

    I think that you will find that the worst offenders for Madeleine jokes are the media, in particular the Olive Press usually follwed by The Sun and The Sunday Express. The biggest comedians would be Antonella Lazzeri and Neil Syson. Have you not seen their spoof articles about gypsies in white vans, letters from dead paedophiles, mystery men and anonymous witnesses?
    If Madeleine was alive she would be suffering from serious jet lag if you believe these crazy articles. And if Madeleine was with an abductor of any kind, would'nt these crazy news reports force him to go undeground hiding her away and reducing the chances of discovery. Maybe you should look up these reports of these bogus sightings and report them.

  9. the mere fact that the McCanns have escaped responsibility for their actions is an insult to Madeleine, not spudgun's take on their lack of actions.

  10. Is Box 101 close to Orchard House, 5 The Crescent, Rothley, Leicestershire, LE7 7RW?

  11. Yes. Box 101 is very close to the location where Clarence Mitchell asked the public, children and pensioners included, to put money in an envelope and stuff it through the letterbox of the McCanns £600,000 house.

  12. Fabulous bit of satire, Spudgun. Nail on head.
    To all of you out there who think us 'unbelievers' (that is, we don't believe the official McCann line), I suggest you do your own research into this tragic case. Read the police files. Above all else, read the Rogatory interviews and then we can discuss whether or not we are 'ghouls'. A twelve year old could work out that a whole bunch of porkies have been told. Go on, all you Mcsycophants! I DARE you.
    A.K.Westwood. ( I don't hide behind my keyboard)

  13. How about a competition to find the least likely explanation of what happened to Madeleine McCann, with a prize of sycophantic media coverage combined with an appearance before the Leveson Enquiry arranged by Gerry Mc€ann friend, Christopher Bryant MP?

  14. brilliant, but please,please not the tacky wristbands,spare us that at least

  15. Anon @ 1.59 AM. We have already had that explanation from the Mcs! They are not eligible for the prize, surely?

    Well done Spudgun! Your piece truly reflects the nature of the 'sightings'. Worrying times for a certain group of people now the tide is turning.

  16. Nice one Spud :) Its about time someone took the p*ss out of the McCanns. For nearly five years they have done that to some members of the public. Not counting little kids who sent their pocket money and OAPs who sent what to could afford. Its the McCanns that are disgusting. Truth and justice will out.

  17. Spain was a good choice as it's been Nerja, Alhaurin and Fuengirola and it's easy to see why when you know the backgrounds of some of these folk.

  18. Brilliant as usual.

  19. 6 years on and there is still no evidence found, or proof given, that Madeleine McCann was abducted. No matter how much the supporters of those 'parents' wheel it out, without evidence of abduction their rhetoric lacks the substance of logic. This renders that rhetoric, absurd, by definition. If anyone can provide proof here then let them state it.

  20. Lie detector test, just 3 words that show that they are scared to tell the truth

  21. The only reason for the sightings of what was the published image of an infant is to gain the reward for a missing person and be famously congratulated by money from the media. There is no reward as I have been told for a child missing who was to be four years old and share a party she never had. The reward is for finding Madeleine, yet Philomena said in an email it is unconditional at that time. But the issue is that the reward is by making claims in the media as a self-imposed expert on such visual sightings that are not really credible of what they think they saw. There is no reward for a deceased child, but there should be and will be for the finding of the person who has hidden her in any way who uses this child then as a form of self promotion and self employment. No one has asked the obvious and done the obvious. Where was this birthday girl to be of four from the afternoon of the 3rd to when the alarm was raised? The lady who was in the flat above has the most visual on the man seen subversively inside Flat 5B exiting the gate that creaked and had to be lifted up on the latch at 4.30 p.m. This is either a man who was going to take something that belonged to him, or to someone else. Or he is a killer, or a paedophile. I say this as having done the reconstruction walk in June of 2007 as most know I have not been able to do it as described by some witnesses who say they saw things that could not be verified. Verification is ecological validity. It means if there is harm and hazard it has to be realised and prevented by further harm. Most know who I am as they have engaged in conversations to me in the past. But the issue is that the child who is missing is still missing and not seen by an independent person on that afternoon. But the man that was acting suspiciously in the patio region of Matt Oldfield at 4.30 p.m. seen by credible witnesses above who he could not see saw a man turn and test a gate that leads going back to the wall of the patio of 5A. Had this man gone over the wall of the McCann flat to the steps and gone out. I did it so anyone could. And I am not a tennis player, I am a midget.

  22. ^^ You are a tennis player, you are a midget, you are a knob

  23. I can confirm that Anonymous25 August 2013 02:50 is not a knob. Now that's done, and the abuse is over, I would like to ask just one salient question. What exactly is the evidence for the 'abduction' claim? Just the evidence, please.
    John Stead.

  24. ^^^ If you're asking a supporter of the McCann parents to answer that you will be waiting one hell of a long time, mate.